Holy Big Macs
by Pasta Alfredo
Summary: For LLB and GSG's Body Switch Contest: The beautiful Mushroom monarch and the Hungry Citizen of Dream Land go grab a few burgers. The Aftermath? Switched bodies. Ahem...read on if YOU dare!


The young woman skipped happily outside toward a small garden she had dedicated most of her time to.

Although he garden was rich in vegetation, it was rather small in size as well as variety.

Many of the fellow Brawlers that resided in the Mansion with the princess knew she was made to create; she possessed what most call the "Green Thumb".

Many have suggested for the princess to grow other things besides turnips; you know like apples and bananas and stuff.

But being a princess, it was not common for Peach to receive or follow orders from anyone.

This woman only dedicated herself to growing turnips, nothing more than the most beautiful, crispy and mouthwatering turnips.

As she leaned her body over the garden to prevent missing a turnip from being watered, she hardly noticed the many male smashes gazing in secrecy at the beautiful princess from high above their dormitory windows.

"Hm…that's my kind of woman…" Snake rasped as he watched the princess from behind his curtain.

"She's so-a beautiful…" Mario sighed from the second floor window.

"She's like an angel from above…" Pit blushed as he gazed at her from behind the window.

"I don't have the courage to talk to her…" Link muttered as he placed his hand on the glass. "She's too perfect."

"I can try to be her friend…" Ike grinned as he pressed his lips and nose against the glass. "Maybe then I can fight for her because I fight for my friends!"

"Maybe I can impress her with my muscles and my car…" Captain Falcon grinned as he stuck a pose.

"Hey…look at me!" Marth begged from his room as he tapped the window with his fingers. "Look at me, Peach!"

"Whoa…" Popo, Toon Link, Ness, and Lucas all breathed from their window.

"She's going to be my girlfriend when I grow up." Ness smiled.

Popo took his fist and slammed it against Ness' nose. "No, she's not! She's going to be my girlfriend!"

In no time at all, the boys were now rolling on the floor trying to wrestle each other to the ground.

"No mine!" Toon Link cried as he jumped in.

"Boys are so stupid…" Nana scoffed as she watched even the timid Lucas also joining in on the fight for Princess Peach.

Yes, all these men (or boys) watched the young princess day after day as she cared for her turnips.

The question here is, is there a man (or boy) brave enough to approach our beloved princess of the Mushroom Kingdom?

"Peach!"

All of the males standing behind glass turned their heads to face a bouncy pink ball of happiness heading straight toward the princess.

"Kirby!" Peach smiled warmly to him. "How do you do?"

"I am hungry." Kirby replied. "And no one will go to McDonalds with me for a Big Mac. Will you go with me?"

"Well…" The princess hesitated for a moment as her gaze settled on her turnip garden then after a while it rapidly drifted to her adorable friend who looked almost starved to death.

"She'll never accept…" Marth muttered behind his window.

"Why go with that midget when she can go with me?" Captain Falcon stuck another pose behind the clear glass.

Peach swallowed hard before answering. "I usually sing to my turnips after I'm done watering them but I guess one day without singing to them won't hurt them, right?"

"That's the spirit!" Kirby sang happily. "Now let's go grab a Big Mac!"

The male brawlers' mouths all gaped wide open as they watched the princess take the short fat guy's hand within hers as they began strolling toward the restaurant with the huge yellow arches that was right across the street from Smash Mansion.

When Peach opened the door to the restaurant, the strong stench of oily fast food slapped its visitors hard on the face.

The princess shuddered in disgust as she felt the greasiness of the restaurant's fumes sink into her freshly washed pores.

Kirby and Peach slowly approached the counter where they were greeted by Sonic, the fastest runner in Smash Mansion.

"Hey Sonic!" Kirby greeted. "I didn't know you worked at McDonald's."

"What are you going to order?" The hedgehog asked without the slightest interest.

"I'll have 1,000 Big Macs." Kirby replied.

"What about her?" Sonic asked the perturbed princess.

"I'm fine without ordering, thank you." The princess told the cashier.

"What?" Kirby bellowed. "Don't tell me you just came to watch me eat?"

"It's just that…" Peach's lips twisted into a pout before continuing. "I don't really like…"

"Make it one more Big Mac, Sonic." Kirby grinned. "And make it quick."

"Quick is my middle name." Sonic said in monotone.

"Oh! I get it!" Kirby laughed while elbowing the princess. "Quick because he runs really really fast! Ha-ha! You're funny, Sonic!"

"Here's your fat a-s order." Sonic said as he shoved the tray toward the short pink creature.

"Thank you!" Kirby took the full tray from the blue hedgehog's hands and quickly skipped to a booth.

"Hey, you forgot to pay!" Sonic cried but alas, Kirby and Peach could not hear him.

The princess and the pink short creature were already too focused and engaged in a conversation of their own.

"Eat it…come on!" Kirby grinned as he shoved the Big Mac toward the princess' face.

"No thank you…" She replied sweetly. "You go ahead."

"I'll even let you add ketchup to it!" Kirby sang.

"Blegh!" Peach stuck out her tongue between her teeth. "I hate ketchup! Basically, I hate anything with tomato in it."

"Fine, fine." Kirby grinned as he reached for something behind his back. "I have something better for it, anyway."

"What is it?" Peach asked the very mysterious Kirby,

"Chocolate syrup!" Kirby grinned as he poured the dark brown liquid on top of the beef patty. "Have you tried it on a Big Mac? It will change your life."

"Chocolate syrup? On a Big Mac?" Peach grunted. "That's disgusting…"

"Don't judge before trying it yourself..." Kirby held the oozing burger toward the princess' gaze. "Come on, let's be honest here. Doesn't that look appetizing?"

Once Peach inspected the burger closely, she was truly amazed at how delicious the chocolate syrup appeared as it slowly oozed and dripped from the soggy burger.

" Well...Alright." Peach said as she grasped the burger in both hands. "I'll eat it. But let's do it together, alright?"

"At the count of three…" Kirby said as he held his burger to his large mouth. "One…two…three!"

As soon as the two hungry brawlers took their first bite out of their burger, everything to their surroundings began to spin frantically around them.

"What's going on?" Peach wondered as she looked around nervously. "Why is everything spinning?"

"I...have no...idea…" Kirby said as his eyelids slowly began to droop over his eyes. "I feel like I'm on an overdose of medication…a medication with many side effects. Side effects. Side Effects."

"I do too…" Peach grasped her head in order to keep it from falling to her chest but it was only a matter of time before Peach and Kirby's bodies slammed to the linoleum floor of the fast food restaurant.

* * *

**Ook...after Kirby and Peach consume a soggy Big Mac dripping with chocolate syrup, they faint?**

**How the heck did that happen?**

**A better question would be...what will be the aftermath?**

**Read on...if you DARE!**


End file.
